I can sympathize with the woman who berated Tonya, although I agree that it isn't the best tactic. The excuse given - not wanting anyone else to force a label on her - is nonsensical. I would guess that Tonya accepts labels all the time; liberal, Red Sox fan, Democrat. People don't mind being labeled when the they like the label... She doesn't like the label because she has bought into the Right's definition of a feminist: angry, man-hating lesbian. Or even if she doesn't believe it, she knows that others do believe it and therefore doesn't want to expend the energy necessary to reclaim it for women.
This is a serious free-rider problem for the feminist movement; women can reap the benefits of advances won by feminists while disdaining the movement. Some, like Phyllis Schlafly, actually fight to take out the movement that created the conditions for their success. The anger Tonya felt was free-rider backlash; Tonya's independence is a product of feminism, and her failure to stand with feminists, to identify as a feminist, hurts the movements and places even greater pressure/responsibility on people like the angry woman in the story.
As for ideas on how to be constructive... I think it is useful to ask people what or who they think a feminist is; get them to describe a feminist first, then you can sort through the detritus and help them begin to form a new picture of feminism. Perhaps a picture of themselves.
I can sympathize with the woman who berated Tonya, although I agree that it isn't the best tactic. The excuse given - not wanting anyone else to force a label on her - is nonsensical. I would guess that Tonya accepts labels all the time; liberal, Red Sox fan, Democrat. People don't mind being labeled when the they like the label... She doesn't like the label because she has bought into the Right's definition of a feminist: angry, man-hating lesbian. Or even if she doesn't believe it, she knows that others do believe it and therefore doesn't want to expend the energy necessary to reclaim it for women.
This is a serious free-rider problem for the feminist movement; women can reap the benefits of advances won by feminists while disdaining the movement. Some, like Phyllis Schlafly, actually fight to take out the movement that created the conditions for their success. The anger Tonya felt was free-rider backlash; Tonya's independence is a product of feminism, and her failure to stand with feminists, to identify as a feminist, hurts the movements and places even greater pressure/responsibility on people like the angry woman in the story.
As for ideas on how to be constructive... I think it is useful to ask people what or who they think a feminist is; get them to describe a feminist first, then you can sort through the detritus and help them begin to form a new picture of feminism. Perhaps a picture of themselves.